Happy Atheist Day



The atheists brain children Love to use this in place of Merry Christmas hoping to piss off the Christians…. I guess nobody told them…


Holiday- Holy Day

All I can do is shake my head and Wave and return their greeting.

Happy Holy Day.

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For lunch you can have a Chicken and Egg on Toast…But which to put first chicken or egg… hmmm


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Then Its off to the Church of Atheism (New Pope You Know)

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And the Pope says for dinner flying spaghetti and a meaty balls take it or leave it.

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Happy Atheist Day!


Agnostic Jokes 11


A christian asks an Agnostic, 
"What did You have at the Atheist dinner?"
"Some spaghetti, meatballs, and 769 green peas."
"Do not bullshit me, when did You count the peas?"
"When Richard Dawkins stood up to give his speech."

Agnostic Question1

Normal people ... believe that if it ain't broke,
don't fix it.

Atheists believe that if it ain't broke,
it doesn't have enough lack of belief yet.

Agnostic Question1

Light travels faster than sound. 

This is why some Atheists appear bright
until you hear them speak. 
Agnostic Question1
Three men, a Christian, an Atheist, and
an Agnostic, were condemned to be executed. 

Their captors told them that they had 
the right to have a final meal before the execution.

They asked the Christian what he wanted.
"Give me the body and blood of Christ" he requested. 
So they gave it to him, he ate it, 
and then they executed him. 

Next it was the Atheists turn.
"Give me a big plate of pasta, 
the spaghetti and a meat a balls" 
said the Atheist. 
So they brought it to him,
 he ate it, and then they executed him.

Now it was the Agnostic's turn. 
"I want a big bowl of strawberries, "
said the Agnostic. "Strawberries!!!
They aren't even in season!"
"So, I'll wait..."

Agnostic Question1

An Atheist, an Agnostic and a Christian are working on a 

very high scaffolding. Suddenly, the Atheist falls off.
He is killed instantaneously.
After the ambulance leaves with the Atheist's body, 
The Agnostic and the Christian realize 
they'll have to inform his wife.

The Agnostic says he's good at this sort of
sensitive stuff, 
so he volunteers to do the job.

After two hours he returns, carrying a large bowl of 
spaghetti and a meat a balls. 
"So did you tell her?" asks the Christian.

"Yep", replies The Agnostic.

"Say, where did you get the large
bowl of spaghetti and a meat a balls?"

The Agnostic informs the Christian. 
"She bought it for me, the Atheists wife."

"WHAT??" exclaims the Christian, "you just told her, 
her husband died and she bought you
a large bowl of spaghetti and a meat a balls?"

"Sure," The Agnostic says.

"WHY?" asks A Christian.

"Well," The Agnostic continues, 
"when she answered the door,
I asked her, 'are you the Atheist's widow?' 
'Widow?', she said, 
'no, no, you're mistaken, I'm not a widow!' 

So I said: "I'll bet you a large 
bowl of spaghetti and a meat a balls, you ARE!"


"Do you believe in life after death?" 

the Agnostic boss asked one of his atheist employees.

"NO!!!, Sir." the new recruit replied.

"Well, then, that makes I suggest you adjust 
your lack of belief," the boss went on.
"After you left early yesterday 
to go to your grandmother's funeral, 
she stopped in to see you."

Agnostic Question1

An Atheist, a Theist, an Agnostic, and a Gnostic were asked to name the greatest invention of all times.
The Gnostic chose fire, which gave humanity power over matter.
The Atheist chose the wheel, which gave humanity the power over space.
The Theist chose the alphabet, which gave humanity power over symbols and allowing the bible to be written.

The Agnostic chose the thermos bottle.
“Why a thermos bottle?” the others asked.
“Because the thermos keeps hot liquids hot in winter and cold liquids cold in summer.”
“Yes — so what?”
“Think about it.” said the Agnostic reverently. That little bottle — how does it know?”


Do atheists take religion too seriously?

Are Christians just teasing the poor atheist fundies?

Has this has been a matter of moving the goal posts and atheist fundies not getting it?

Back with the Greeks, the believers said: “The Gods live upon this mountain.”
All you’d have to do to verify this would have been to climb the mountain.

The medieval Christians said: “God is watching us from above.”
This became a bit questionable when it was proven that the Earth is not the center of the solar system.
(this is the fellow they don’t believe exists)

Nowadays Christians say: “God cannot be confirmed by science. You need faith to feel him.”
And the atheists don’t know how to deal with that?

Just like atheists try to do with the alien space craft, they keep getting updated reports. In the 50″s they looked like a flying saucers with little green men, the 70’s we get an updates craft and the aliens go from green to grey and make circles as proof and molest cows. Now we have planet sized craft with engines and they don’t crash in Roswell any more (guess they got brakes from our civilization 🙂

And ya wonder why there are agnostics 🙂

“The objective is to convince people that Darwinism is inherently atheistic, thus shifting the debate from creationism vs. evolution to the existence of God vs. the non-existence of God. From there people are introduced to the truth of the Bible and then the question of sin and finally introduced to Jesus.”
— Phillip Johnson, creator of the idea of ‘Intelligent’ Design

It is amusing to see how serious an atheist takes religion… The know and accept and see the humor in the Flying Spaghetti Monster but lose their collective shit when you try and tell them most Christians don’t take Intelligent Design seriously.